Thursday, September 30, 2010

hmm...wat's with today?

my kawan baik...ffk me...
sien...i went ecs lecture alone...not exactly alone...
i got my twin sister there...and my another sister too..
haha...but that does not stop me from falling asleep during the class..
too tired...slept at 1 smtg at the morning....
then it's my physics practical time...
luckily got fren with me...
kinda successful experiment...
im a good hacker in readings^^.
i saw u in canteen while waiting for my next class which is 3 hours later...
i asked u to sit with me...
yeah...u sat beside me...
nice though...haha...

i kinda out of topic talking to u...
hmm...i wonder how do i continue "chasing" u...
lolx...
like ppl say lor...
juz let it be...
since i already start talking to u in person...
although it's kinda cold...
but at least..got some improvement lar...
jyjy ba...A!!!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

hmm...spoiled day...

morning...i went class with my fren...
my close fren not gonna join me...he cant wake up...
i went class as usual...
after finished class...
i walk around...coz my frenz having other class...
then i saw u...
u hav break too...
so...i hang out with you...
i cant find any topic to talk to u...
both seems shy...

i asked u whether u were hungry...
u said u wanna wait ur fren...
accompany her to eat...
or else she'll be all alone...
i respect ur decision...
so...i accompany u... untill ur fren were out...
i kinda happy coz...while waiting...u had a nap...and im doing my maths tutorial...
i keep looking at u without u noticing...
hahahahahha...
but then...
bad news coming...
i went cinema today...
my good fren received a phone call saying that he's gonna leave...
so sad...
i even posted a note bout him in facebook...
haiz...
1 emo day...
juz today....

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

dun too concentrate on doing smtg or u'll GG...

today...my 2 taman-mate not having morning class...
and i dun hav anymore bus ticket with me...
so...i opted using my god's gift...which is my legs apparently...
to walk to school...
early in the morning...
i was asked by my twin to accompany her...
yeah i went there...then my frenz asked me to take breakfast...
i asked my silly twin sis to follow...but she doesnt wan...
nvm...she kinda dislike my fren...^^
back to my real topic...
yeah...i kinda went overboard in liking someone...
im thinking of you every now and then...
i din even see u today...
missed u...
fortunately...u told me u miss me too...although it's in a playful manner^^
but...i feel much better after u said so...
addicted...i heard from my christian fren that if you're doing smtg that's addictive...
then that thing is a devil...
is loving, adoring, admiring, liking someone is smtg devilish?
i dun think so actually...
if you're smtg like drugs, cigarettes...then maybe yeah...
addicted to love? nah~
i sounds like a pro. love guru here...
yeah...sounds like...
but in action...i nv is a pro...maybe not for now^^

Monday, September 27, 2010

shit!

im starting to having the habit of intro-ing smtg stupid b4 i actually start my real topic...
i've been sick for 2 days...
coughing sneezing fluing fever-ing
it's a package...
then..when im on my way back to my "home"...
i ran under the rain...
that makes me even sick now...
haha...ok...enough intro i guess...let's rumble...lolx...
hmm...today is the only day in the week im having the same class with you...
im quite happy actually keep taking a glance at u...
but after keep looking at u...
i notice...i fall deeper...
how...
i cant express my feeling elsewhere...
the feeling is like a bomb almost exploding in my mind...
it's making me mad crazy and insane...
i wish there's smtg that can pull me up...
save me from falling...
cant concentrate in class...
juz a few hours leaving u...
and im already missing u for ages...
when will this misery stops?
shud i confess?
juz give it a try...
at least if im rejected...
there's an excuse that i could stop thinking of you...
good idea...
but...

Sunday, September 26, 2010

hmm...wat shud i write today...

i've been dota-ing this few days...
totally studyless...
im wondering till when im gonna stop...
joined so many diff clan...
how much can a student like me get involve?
lolx...
i need to dota...facebook...study...chat with you...entertain my frenz...
wow...
how...im having problems managing my time...
i dun see u online today...it's 10.26pm already...
nvm...
hmm...nothing to write today...
i only hav lots of food today...
which i dun think so it's wise to share it here...
since this blog is all about u anyway...
hmm...thinking bout yesterday's post...
i'd tot of it over and over again...
i really shud try that kind of feeling...
maybe it's nice...xP

wat thing also wan test...

today...i went my fren house...
he hosted 1 bbq party...
it's diff compared to the bbq party i attended with my uni frenz...
this time...it was easier...
everything was set up...
we only need to bbq the ingredients...
which make life much more easier...
but then...
there too many of them there...
and the place is small...
i ended up going to the mamak for dinner...=.=
after that we went for dota at cc...
it was an easy game for me...
i used to be slightly higher level than them...
but now...
it's even higher...
not trying to boast...
juz that they seldom play...and they mostly play public game which is easier...
enough of  my not-so-important introduction...
hahaha...
start to the real topic...
i felt that u're not that cold already...
u sms with me...
although it's kinda long waiting for ur reply...
but at least...
it's nice...
yeah...
about the title...
i like to experience new things...
for now...
wat i wanna try the most...
is having a girlfriend that i can hug, hold hands and perhaps...kiss?haha...
juz for testing purposes...
wanna noe how it feels...
hahaha...but...i think...it's impossible...
i had a very low esteem personality...
hard to change it...
but nvm...
bcoz...
happy go lucky!
no point?
yes...
tata...^^

Thursday, September 23, 2010

that's the only thing i could do...

it sounds silly really...
trying to avoid u...
u won't feel anything...
but...
i will...
i dunno why...
im trying to avoid u since i like u so much...
it's juz that...it's kinda hard for me to meet u face to face...
my fren called u and we met at canteen...
i could had stay back and continue chatting...
but instead...i went to comp. lab...
i looked at u from top...
that's the only thing a coward like me can do...
this post sounds emo...
but...
im not emo...
hahahaha^^

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

my first time celebrate mooncake festival...

wow...
for the first time in my life...
i went out celebrate some event with my frenz and other university students...
when i was small...
i kinda envy those ppl in a group play together and enjoy...
my father would never let me out to join these occasion...
but nvm...
i wasn't going to emo bout that...since i quitted bcoz of u^^
hmm...i kinda miss u...
but...nvm...haha...
im glad...at least...for i got that kind of experience...
i kinda quiet today...
sorry...
im not used to this kind of thing...
but...
time will make me get used to it...
thanks a lot my fren...for organizing such event...i cant mention ur name here...hope u understand^^

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

gosh...

i had a pack timetable so that i could hav class for only 4 days...
it's kinda tiring...
and without having a glance at u like wat i always did last sem...
it's like i dun hav any reason to stay awake...
one of the reason im tired is bcoz i played games till late at night...
i think im gonna change my bad habit...
but that means...
i won't be chatting with you already...
nvm...
wat matters the most is my study after all...^^
hahaha...xP

Monday, September 20, 2010

hmm...i think im all set^^

my frenz r leaving me...
but im won't emo...
haha...coz...
dunno...
it seems that u dun like ppl emo...
and that makes me not emoing...
it's a good news anyway...
now that im all alone...
i'll need to practise how to noe more ppl...
of coz it'll hard at first...
but i think i could make it^^
about u le...
i think im more mature in handing this kind of stuff...
im gonna study all the way...
fulfill my ambition...
and from there onwards then i'll start thinking bout these things...
it's kinda silly to think bout these when im still financially dependent rite?
haha...
it's even silly im talking to myself here...
but nvm...it's my feeling...
that's my title of the blog...
happy always...make this world a better place!!! xP

Saturday, September 18, 2010

juz when the tot of thinking you're awesome...

this morning...when i was looking at some photos posted by ppl in facebook...
there's a photo suggestion on the top right corner...
and i saw it's you...
i clicked on it...
and wow...
u're wearing prom dress...
it's incredibly amazing the way u dress...
but...
after looking for a while...
i realized that...
u look like shu qi...
i hate that actress!!!
then i start wondering...
in wat sense do u attracted me???
i cant seem to find anything...
ur look like that slutty actress...
and u r undoubtedly cold...
why why why???
maybe im juz lying to myself?
if so...
does that mean that...
this whole blog is actually a lie?
gosh...i nd to climb out of this shadow...
hope that the next semester would be a better semester for me...
last but not least...
im glad i stopped emo...
we shud not be emo...
let's make this world a better place...^^

Friday, September 17, 2010

haiz...gg...

i got bad results...
is it bcoz of u?
i noe...
i cant make an excuse my studies r bad bcoz of u...
now i hope...
next semester i wont repeat the same mistake...
since i will only see u only once a week...
maybe slowly the feeling will fade...
lately...
i frequently sms-ing with the other girl...
almost forgotten u...
the confusion...still there...
do i really like u?

im confused again!

now i realize...
do i really like u?
or the urge of wanna noe u makes me attracted to u?
now that i noe u d...
i think i dun hav that kind of feel towards u...
wondering why i say so?
it's bcoz...
i think i liked another gal...
a gal that is much better than u while chatting...
we hav so much fun chatting...
but u...
always cold...
u nv give me any hints...
so...i assume u juz treat me as fren...
and as a result of that...
i found out that i not really like u after all...
but...
this type of thing...
i cant predict i cant tell...
wat will happen tmr nobody noes...
maybe tmr i'll be missing u...
maybe tmr i'll be missing that another gal...
maybe i juz dunno wat's the definition of like or love after all...
but...
i seriously confused now...
do i really like u?
or the girl?
nvm...
juz...
let it be!
happy always^^

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

weird eh?

yeah i noe...
i changed my layout...
brighter...
wanna noe why?
i quit emo^^
my fren's statement woke me up...
he said...
can't get girl only ma...
scared wat?
not say got no other girl...
that statement is wat i used to tell them...
bcoz of u...
i suddenly forgotten the real me...
emo...
im gonna leave u...
and to all those emo-er...
we only live once in a lifetime...
appreciate it...
no matter how suffer ur life is...
juz think...
how do u wan ur life ends?
happy and exciting?
or sad and dull?
dun waste time...
do wat u like!

Saturday, September 11, 2010

im addicted(2)

i went out with you again...
this time...for the whole day...
i can't stop glancing at you...
it's like a magnet that keep me staring at you...
today is the day you going back home...
although it's only after a few hours...
but...
im starting to miss you already...
i wished i could go out with you everyday although i got no whr to bring you...
but at least...
i got to see you...
im starting to neglect my frenz bcoz of you...
not that i forget them...
im juz too obsessed with you...
your smile...
brightens up my life...
this memory...will always be in my mind...
fresh and vividly...

Friday, September 10, 2010

im addicted...

i gave up on 2nd day...
i "like" ur wall post at facebook...
then...u proceed by commenting my status...
i cant help it but ask u out yesterday...
i dunno if u're bored...
im not a good host...
and now...
i had to admit that...
im addicted...
i wanna go out everyday with you...
haiz...

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

miss u...

day 1...
i still din msn or sms u...
and so do u...
im missing u...
i hope that feeling will fade soon...
not hope...
it's a must...
i cant bear this type of feeling...
i still see ur profile every single second...
juz see without commenting anything...
u tell ur frenz that u going to meet them...
which is the same place as me...
u din tell me...
u were happy today...
bcoz u passed ur car license...
i wish to congrat u...
but...
i had to control myself...
when will this end...

finale...

bbq today...
i glance at u a few times...
i wonder...
wat u hav that attracted me...
i cant figure it out...
we din manage to take pic together...
but nvm...
the only pic we were together...
i will save it forever...
end of sem 1...
i wont be meeting u that often d...
2 weeks break...
it's like a curing phase for me...
i hope i can forget u asap...
probably today is the last goodbye from me to u...
i wont be msn or sms u...
sem 2 is the beginning of my new life...
after this experience...
i realize how powerful is this feeling...
i will prevent myself not to look at any girls...
books and my laptop will be my only companion...
goodbye my lover~

Sunday, September 5, 2010

haiz...

for the first time in so many days i noe u...
u din online tonight...
i felt tonight is empty...
tmr would be my chemistry exam...
after that...
will be our bbq party...
i dunno how to meet u tmr...
so long din meet u d...
the shyness...
i could not imagine...
haiz...

Saturday, September 4, 2010

im confused again...

i met u again after 1 week of not seeing u...
saw u going back home...
ur expression is cold...
i wonder why...
i realized...
i dun even dare to walk near u...
it's only a week...
and im missing u like hell...
ytd...
u treat me exceptionally cold...
i guess it's bcoz of the upcoming exam...
u totally forgotten the 4 things u promised...
i noe...
for u maybe u juz promise it for fun...
but...
i take it very seriously...
nvm though...
i listen some experience from my fren...
her gf treat her coldly...
they kept arguing...
the girl thinks that the boy did not give her freedom...
im afraid of these...
if it happens to me...
i wonder how could i handle it...
to play safe...
i'd rather continue in this relationship...
than juz make the situation awkward...
i cant afford to lose a fren...

Thursday, September 2, 2010

hmm...

i got nothing to write here for the time being...
i juz tot that...
wat goes around comes around...
if my fren wanna flirt u...
i'll juz let him...
u accept or reject...
i wouldn't mind anymore...^^
im such a happy person now...
whr r all my emo???
hahahaha...
juz rmb...there's somebody in the world...
who crazes u whole heartedly...^^

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

confused...

i realize that i dun noe u that much...
u always unwilling to share ur prob...
i wonder why...
i saw ur msg in my fren's phone...
that jealousy attacked me again...
but luckily...
i managed to get over it...
i kept make myself think that i had already let u go...
it works for the time being...
i heard from my fren that u need to explain a lot to ur father everytime u go out...
so...i think i misunderstood u about the movies i asked u out the other day...
but...who cares now...
doesnt matter anymore...
juz now...
my fren joked with me...
saying that after our party...
i would do that thing to u...
and u wake up shouting the next day...
i really cant imagine anything...
i dun even wanna imagine it...
i nv had this kind of feeling...
so weird...
i hope i will show this blog to u one day...
not hoping for anything...
juz wanna let u noe...
there's some silly person in this world...
that crazes u so desperately...

i continue...upon request...

tonight...u treated me hot and cold...at least u find some topic for me..
i asked u if u got anything to share with me...
u say got...
but then...
u tell me...
u lazy to send it to me...
u already send it to somebody else...
my mood is actually good today...
because of that few sentence...
u made me jealous...
i tot i already gave up on u...
but how come...
why???
why must i still jealous???
i asked u...who u like...
u tell me u like everyone...
i noe...
u like making frenz...
u're a social queen...
im not...
im juz an antisocial freak...
a guy...
but no balls...
afraid of doing things...
im afraid of failure...
im afraid of lots of things...
i tot i posted the last post...
but...
i juz cant stop...
argh...wat a miserable life i had...
i wish human doesnt come with emotions...
i hate these...