1 week already...

tomorrow, tomorrow and tomorrow...

creeps in this petty pace from day to day...

to the last syllabus of recorded time...

and all our yesterdays have lighted fools...

the way to dusty death...

out, out brief candle!

life's but a walking shadow...

a poor player...

that struts and frets at his hour upon the stage...

and then is heard no more...

it is a tale...

told by an IDIOT...

full of sound and fury...

signifying nothing...

-william shakespear-

my current situation reminds me of my time in secondary school...

whr i was studying this poem as a literature component...

back on that time...i tot this poem was jz a bullshit...

i was having a carefree lifestyle...

i lived my life with joy everyday...

im an active music member and me and my frenz spent most of our time practising for our upcoming performance or competition...

we had so much fun together despite some misunderstanding that may cause us to fight sometimes...

but...that's part of life wasn't it?

HOWEVER~

when i enter university life...it seems like my days in heaven comes to an end...

i met a girl i like..

i flirted her...

we coupled...

now we break...

it's like a cycle...

from stranger we become friends...

from friends we become couple...

from couple we become stranger...

and now...slowly turning into enemies...

life seems sux for me now...

jz like the poem...

creeps in this petty pace from day to day...

time's moving so slowly...

but dun worry...im not gonna end my life that soon...

i had a dream to fulfill...

but...

how could i continue from now?

when would i pursue my dreams?

i jz came back to my "hostel" from my hometown...

i realized i forgotten to bring my broadband...

so...im unable to online for these few weeks...

my finals' coming in a week time...

guess...it's time for me study study and study...

now im onlining at my fren's house...

thank him for letting me online...

guess that's all this time...

so in the end...she still refuse to forgive me...

so...that's the thing...she still...can't forgive me...

i understand the pain she had...

but...din she try to understand me too?

she's rather not to be hurt than leaving me like this...

is she selfish?

dun she noe that she's sad im sad too?

she wan us to remain fren...

but let me ask...

after coupling for almost 3 months...

everytime i see her after our separation...

i wont feel anything huh?

i wont hurt huh?

why she dun give me a chance?

why?

now it's either i str8 forget her...

or... we get back together again...

i wont be that silly to be frenz with her...

with such selfish attitude...(in my opinion)

she's not even worth it...

now...

i gave up on love...

my studies...i let it be...im sure that it would turn from bad to worse...

my chem lecturer keep finding for me bcoz i did badly for my recent chem test...

and i think my bio din reach the passing mark too...

my best subject...maths...i think is around the border line...

wat had happened to me...

1 girl? ruin my life...

gosh...

forgiveness...

yeah...bout the topic...

everyone here noes that i need a forgiveness desperately...

and...talking bout this...i suddenly recalled a malay movie i watched long time ago...

that movie was about a man who was jailed for burglary...

after he was released from the jail...he searched for his family...

eventually, he found his family...but...his family...thought it was a disgrace having him with them...

so...knowing that he could no longer stay in this family...

he left...

he looked for jobs...but everyone in the city noes bout his past...

they throw a disgusted look at him...looking down at him...some even throw rotten eggs at him...

he endured all of that...

started opening a stall repairing shoes whr he learnt the skill during his days in the prison...

he received minimal income...but...at least enough for him to earn a living...

one day...there's 1 lady walk pass his stall...

she fell down while she walks...this cobbler step forward to help her by carrying her handbag...

that lady...doesn't express gratitude but accused the cobbler for trying to snatch her handbag...

she threatened to bring him to the police station...

he tried to explain but that lady insisted that she was right...

after a few minutes of argument...an onlooker...who so happened to see the whole incidence explained to the lady...

that passerby told the lady..."everyone has the rights to correct his/her mistakes...

but if u dun even give him a chance to correct his mistakes...

he would only do the same mistakes again as ppl already thought that he would only do again and again..."

in chinese...we said...做人不要太绝...毕竟都是人...总要留一点的生路让他改变...

that lady finally acknowledge that she was wrong...

she apologised and left shyly...

the moral of the story is...no matter how bad a person was in the past...

as long as he's willing to correct his wrong...we should give him a chance... 

DUMB~

walao...i really use my ass to think...

do liao smtg then regret...wat the hell...

i really hate her for doing those to me...

but...

why must i feel so depressed...damn...

whyyyyy...

now she din reply me...

wat is she doing???

im darn worried...

nooooo...

sorry readers...i really stupid...

foolish...

dumb...

finally...the end of this story...

hmm...as expected...lost my car...lost my friendship...lost my studies...

now...im almost reaching to lose my relationship!!! hahaha...

i dunno lar...jz feel that...in a relationship...

wat we must hav is...communication...

and also...both party must be committed...

no doubt everyone would agree bout this...but...how many actually do it?

i've got this experience whr...i dunno...

maybe it's my prob or smtg...but...

seriously...i feel that...if u dunno well about the girl/boy that u think u like...

my suggestion is...dun go for it...

as time passes...u would noe...the weakness of the other...

if u cant accept it...u'll only get disappointment...

then...no point continuing that relationship...

both would suffer...wat's the point right?

u would think that i might be bullshitting here...but...

since u made an effort to read this...why not jz continue?

but...of coz...if it's really irritating u...then...my apologize...u may go to the X button and click it...

hmm...wat happened today?

actually it's kinda epic...haha...

actually u shud read yesterday's post b4 reading this...

ytd i talk bout me asking her out~

yeah...me asking her out...and she rejected me...sad case~ haha...

so...today...i heard from my fren that...wow...

she went out eating with her other frenz~

amazing wasn't it???

she... told me...that she's tired...but... end up eating with her frenz! haha! nice rite?

and yeah...bcoz of that...im gonna break up with her...that's enough...

after all i tolerated...that's it...

bye bye my lover...oops...now i hate her..^^

do u noe that the more u love someone...if he/she...so happened to made u hate her...gosh...

u dun wanna noe...it's like he/she...jz killed that someone u loved so much...

that feeling...gosh...that's so much hatred!

yeah...u must be wondering that im crazy or wat...

no!

im happy with it...

H-A-P-P-Y!

finally...TATA^^ 

p/s:no more writing this blog i guess...

unlucky...

im a very unlucky person...

no doubt...i jz lost my car...an EZ850 kancil...

the car's almost 20 years since it was first bought by...i got no idea who was it...nvm...not important...

the point is...it's a kancil...who on earth would wan a kancil?

if u really wanna sell it...well...it worth 4k i guess...but...

why risk being caught for jz 4k? u can jz take any honda civic around...

it'll earn u more...and...the punishment is the same...

why...there's so many kancils...why mine?

i nd it to go school...i nd it to bring myself for meal...

i nid it to spend time with her...

now...it's gone...i nd to walk to school...

i nid to walk to eat...

and...i cant meet her...

i dun understand...why loving someone could be so hard...

she tell me she loves me...

but...why...watever she did doesnt show that she loves me?

why?

i dun understand...she doesnt tell me anything...

she doesnt tell me wat she feel...

we got limited time together...

why?

not only these...my parents...give me pressure everytime im back home...

my father jz rush and wanna open my fren's car door...

my fren lock the door and jz drive away...my dad knock my fren's windows =.=!!
wat the hell...
now she keeps emo me...haiz...FML

i jz dun understand...

yeah...i had a gf now...but...

i still cant get away from emoness...

why???

there she goes...my gf...yeah...gf a.k.a. girlfriend...

wat do girlfriend do?

well...the main thing is of coz...

love her bf...

and...yeah...of coz...care her bf's feeling...

now...wat happens to me is that...

i dun understand wat my gf understand...

sounds blur...but yeah...it's jz as simple as that...

i repeat again...i dun understand wat my gf understand!

hmm...i told her that i would like to see her everyday if im allowed to do so...

so she's ok with it...

and...i offer to fetch her back so that i could see her...

it's bcoz...we're kinda in an underground relationship...

she doesn't wan anyone to noe bout us bcoz she's afraid that her mum will get to noe this...

im fine with it...

so...1 day after class...i followed her and she ask me why do i follow her?

and i ask her back..."i tot im suppose to fetch u home?"

she said..."no, since when?"

then i was like...huh? hello...i jz told u ytd?

then wat she could do is jz tell me sorry...

ppl...if everything is as easy as sorry...world war I or world war II wouldn't exist...am i right?

and wat could i do? i could only said nvm...

but in my heart...the sorrow within...gosh...i couldn't describe...

then...move on to the other story...

i asked her our for a movie...

her mother dun allow her...

i can't do anything...so...im ok with it...

but i ask her can she accompany me for my meal...

then she said she's ok...

then today when im on my way...i ask her whr to eat...

she tell me she wanna go back home...

again...i was like...HUH??? HELLO??? U GONNA FFK ME AGAIN???

so...that's the story...how many more can i tolerate...it's jz a question mark...

and..im currently starving...moody...loss my appetite to eat...FML~